


Wish upon a Star

by LornaD



Series: The Sandpit Series [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Gen, Humor, M/M, Other, all deaths are very PG
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-11
Updated: 2018-01-18
Packaged: 2019-03-03 14:47:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13343448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LornaD/pseuds/LornaD
Summary: In the Wish Virus universe  you have the force born hit with a virus that lowers their inhibitions to zero and causes them to act on them . The younger the Force born the simpler the hidden desire and all of that resulted in this.. minor charactors taking centre stage and all we thought we knew about the Star Wars goes side ways with large helpings of insanity.





	1. When the virus

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Not My Berth](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12428262) by [Merfilly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merfilly/pseuds/Merfilly). 



> Please do not read this series while operating heavy machinery and don't drink anything unless your wearing an apron and not facing some one. I will not pay for your cleaning bills. I own nothing,

In the Wish Virus universe you have the force born hit with a virus that lowers their inhibitions to zero and causes them to act on them . The younger the Force born the simpler the hidden desire and all of that resulted in this.

When the virus hit most of the adults became preoccupied with fulfilling their hidden desires. This gave the younger generations much more leeway for fulfilling their own desires.  


.............................................................

It starts with a little initiate Jedi deciding that the nice smelling, generous with hugs clones need to be back in the crèche with them. So the teen-tiny Wookie wanders down to where the clone barracks are and just kind of grabs the first two they run in to and dragging them back to the crèche  


.............................................................

Yep A teeny-tiny Wookie who looks like a cute little teddy bear who’ll rip your arms off and beat you with them if you try to take their clones away from them, and since said Wookie’s a generous soul who’s shared her clones with the rest of their crèche mate you will get pelted by them to. The clones were going off shift anyway and finger-painting is turning out to be more fun than the bar they were original headed for.  
.  
With the Crèche Masters currently pre-occupied elsewhere. This starts a trend with all the other Crèche’s getting into this and kind of marched down and to get their own clones to hug .  


.............................................................

Including Commander Fox who Bear clan managed to force suggest into coming back with them since he radiated pain in the force. Bear clan initiates are now very worried since clones and especially clone commanders aren’t weak willed and that really should not have worked.

.............................................................

Bear Clan have striped Commander Fox to his blacks and he is now being sat on by one of the avian initiates that look like a Rhode Island Red while everyone else in Bear clan are petting his hair and any other part of him that pokes out from under the Avian initiate, while surrounding him with the force and telling him, he’s safe, until they can make his soul feel less bruised.

.............................................................

If this doesn’t work all the initiates in Bear Clan are going to take him down to the healers hall and not let him leave until he feels better in the force. `  


.............................................................

The initiates of Bear Clan have in their innocent way picked up on the damage that Darth Sidious likes to inflicted on Commander Fox, because abusing one of his toys in front of the Jedi and getting away with it is pleasure Sidious just can’t resist . Several hours later a rested and greatly improved Fox makes the connection between the migraines he’s been suffering since he arrived on Coruscant and his proximity to Chancellor Palpatine  


.............................................................

Thus channelling Jango Fett and nearly blind with rage Commander Fox storms in to the senate, with the Bear Clan initiates in tow, to confront Chancellor Palpatine, in front of a large number of senators. As Darth Sidious enslaves Fox with one of the embedded commands and starts to spin the situation to his advantage, Master Vokara Che casualy saunters up behind him and sticks a hyperspray with a mix of Force suppressant and instant knock out drug to Sidious’s neck. Then with an arched eyebrow that fans of Startrek will be very familiar with, .  


.............................................................

Master Che says “What ! There’s a reason the rest of the Jedi order are terrified of me and the council haven’t let me out on missions away from the temple since my first 9 months as a knight.” “Now let’s get you all back to the temple, I don’t know what’s happening but you all need a through work up at the healing halls” and with that stunned senators only watch as Master Vokara Che serenely heads back down the corridor with Sidious bobbing along behind her like a strange helium balloon, with a furiously blushing Commander Fox and his kids trailing after her. Commander Fox now has a crush and knows that his vode will be teasing him about HIS Jedi General.

And thus Order 66 is derailed at the hands of a clone, a healer and a bunch of meddlesome kids. 

After a full medical work up in the healing halls Master Vokara Che sends the following statement to all the healers regarding the initiate clans new found healing technique “We don't know why the initiates sit on you and surround you with the force and pettings healing technique works, just that it does, but Katarn and Hawkbat clans have already agreed to sit on Master Obi-wan for me” ” When Master Kenobi arrives back at the temple YOU WILL send him to me first”  
……………………  
.  
Fox and the Initiates are just too young to have heard about Vokara Che. The initiates usual find out from their masters when they become padwan. and 9 months, that’s how long it took for tales of Knight Vokara Che path of terror and Destruction, mass property damage and Gibbering disbelief to get back to the council.  


.............................................................

No matter how much trouble Qui Gon got into Dooku was always grateful he wasn't nearly as good at it as Vokara Che, Now if only he could get Qui-gon to understand the importance of proper reporting and paperwork.


	2. On a morning in the future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Master Vokara Che hero

On a morning in the future happily wrapped around his Jedi Cody finally asks the question that’s been bugging him since the rather embarrassing defeat of the hidden Sith Lord and the end of the war.

“Obi-wan, So why didn’t the council make Master Che a general,” Cody asked” if she’s such a bad ass the war would have been over within a year?  


.............................................................

“More like 6 months, dear heart.” Obi-wan replied” The council were scared stiff of a repeat performance. According to Master Dooku it took the Council and the full cooperation of Supreme Chancellor Finis Valorum to spin the tales in a way that was palatable for the majority of the senate and even then it took a very public scandal regarding the affair of four senator’s involving inappropriate use of cleaning droids, cos play, root vegetables and holo ball match fixing for them to succeed. Master Dooku was very suspicious of the convenient timing of the scandal’s discovery.”

“Apparently “ Obi-wan said stroking his beard thoughtfully” the paperwork she managed to generate was quite extraordinary”  
“what Dooku told you?” Cody shouted

“Yes, we met in the archives after Master Jinn and I had complete our mission to protect the Duchess during the Mandalorian Civil War. I was there trying to find out why Bo-Katan and many other Mandalorian female younglings had a Vokara Che doll.” Obi-wan said with a grin ”Bo was very firm that it was not a Jedi doll but a Vokara Che doll. Given the usual dislike of Jedi by Mandalorians, I was curious to find out what made Che different. Apparently many Mandalorians consider Master Che actions in the field to make her an appropriate role model for their female younglings.” 

.............................................................

“Master Dooku said that “Master Jinn was going through one of his phases when Dooku tried to tell him about her” and whenever I’ve tried to tell Anakin’s he’s always been too busy with his friends to listen to stories like that.” Sighed Obi-wan with an unhappy expression on his face, causing Cody once again to get certain ideas about his general’s ex-padwan  


.............................................................

And this is also the reason that Bo-Katan despite being in Death Watch still talks to Jedi Master Obi-wan, she still has the armour plate that Obi-wan got Master Vokara Che to autograph for her back when she was still a teen, squee!!!  


.............................................................

Darth Sidious has no idea how lucky he was that Master Vokara Che was not deployed by the council because Count Dooku’s response to Darth Sidious would be more along the lines of “Hell no way and hermitage on Tatooine sounds like a really great idea about now.”  


.............................................................

His alterative plan would be to trail along with her pointing out targets he knows Sidious is going to be pissed to lose though in Che case it’s more like ground down in to a fine dust and spread all over the outer rim while drinking sufficient quantities of beer to prevent him thinking about how bad an idea this is.  


.............................................................

So there you have Master Vokara Che  
Terror of the Jedi  
Scourge of the Galaxy  
Kryptonite of the Sith  
Role model and heroine to Mandalorian Girls everywhere…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And seriously evil blot bunny  
> I now badly want a Vokara Che doll


	3. INTERLUDE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> People who owned a Vokara Che doll

Leia Organa ;; Jedi no, that a traditional handicraft doll we picked up on Concord Dawn

Bobo Fett ::::: “no Jango you or'dinii* “ Rav Bralor” you cant give a child that young a blaster to cuddle, he can have my old Che doll”

Numa :: Her nerras thought it was cute

Rey :::: She found it while salvaging one of the big battle cruisers.

Hux: ::::::: “ Put that down right now. That’s a limited edition autographed antique Knight Vokara Che doll. Do you have any idea how rare this. Go destroy parts of the Finaliser we can replace those”. “ there, there Che I won’t let the Nasty Kylo hurt you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please feel free to come up withyour own version of someone who owned a Che doll  
> • Mando Tranlation * or'dinii - moron or fool


	4. In all the excitement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Never give Skywalker too much sugar, leads to the dark side it does.

In all the excitement a sugared up Anakin proclaimed his undying love and devotion to Senator Amidala. Unfortunately an bat eared holo reporter picked it up, cleaned it up and then sent it out on the holo news along with a private sex tape that caused Senator Naberrie to gain the nick name of wham bam Amidala .  
Said reporter follow up the tape with the following sound bites from friends and colleagues  
Obi-wan (Snarks) “Well that explains why he’s so bendy, when he’s always refused to learn Yoga because it’s too girly”  
Mace Windu” This! This is why I don’t have any hair!”  
Bail” I have always admired Padmé Amidala Naberrie for her work ethic, I just never knew she worked that hard”  
Yoda " Stamina they have impressive it is.”

The long term effects of the Skyberrie sex tape on Grandmaster Yoda had decidedly unexpected results, mostly caused by the Grandmaster whole heartedly embracing the concept that the Jedi order and his line especially need more nookie in their lives.

The following unexpected live holo broadcast resulted in the Hutt’s offering sanctuary to any Jedi who wanted it, it’s unknown if any Jedi actually took up the offer.

Knight SkyWalker and the Naboo Senator Padmé Amidala Naberrie are confronting the Grandmaster Yoda and a number of Council members on the steps of the Jedi Temples main entrance. As the shouts and accusations die down on both sides all turn to look to the Grandmaster for wisdom..

Yoda his ears turned down “Hmm, Skywalker too rigid you are, have nookie with Naboo senator you should”

Into the deafening silence broken only by Anakin spluttering in front of a holo crew and a bunch of temple Jedi, 

Yoda follows up with “Young, you are .. Recommended three times a night, get it up you should”

Padme replies “Oh three times is only a start...”

As Skywalker turns an interesting shade of puce and attempts to become one with the duracrete all those watching turn back to Yoda with fascinated horror. In the background you can just see Commander Ponds going above and beyond the call of duty, as he hurriedly drags a foaming Mace Windu away before he can head-butt the nearest temple wall repeatedly .

Yoda gives Padme an assessing eye. “Much stamina you have impressive it is!”

Padme examines her finger nails with a smirk “Mucha, Mucha Stamina”

(In the 212’s gobsmacked Rec room a panicked Obi-wan turns to Commander Cody “Sith!, We need to plan our escape. Yoda’s bad enough with his determination to get his line to have more nookie but now that he’s found a willing flyting partner he’ll be insufferable”)

Yoda his ears turned down says “ In my youth much stamina had I, all 786 positions of the Ste lazan Kuma Sutra I mastered.” 

An awed Padme says “You must have been really flexible Master Yoda in your youth. I’ve only managed to get Anakin to try the first three positions of the Ste lazan Kuma Sutra”

Yoda “Jedi Master I am, 900 years old I am, Still 436 positions still do I can” replies.

With a look of intense interest on her face Padme responses eagerly “ Such a wealth of experience should not be wasted, I have a rather nice set of etchings you might like to examine”

Yoda” Joining us Skywalker will he? “ As his ears rise 

Padame sighs ” Sadly Anakin does not have the same appreciation for art I do, but my handmaiden Sabe studied the Ste lazan Kuma Sutra with me on Naboo and I have no doubt she will love to join our discussion”

 

At this point Anakin is rocking back and forth as he realised that not only has his angel enjoyed Sappho style affections of her handmaidens (what its lonely being Queen!) but has just agreed to a threesome with his Great, Great Grandmaster. There is not enough brain bleach in the republic for this.

Later on when he finally gets round to reading the small print on that marriage contract of theirs. Anakin discovers that while the Naboo are very traditional about marriage, children and gender roles. When it comes to sex as long as no children will result, then anything goes and frequently does go, this no rules regarding sex is zealously promoted by the Naboo Government to keep their citizens happy since divorce is illegal on Naboo. 

In another part of the galaxy Obi-wan and Cody are hurriedly gathering the 212 up . They’ll figure out what to do later, right now getting into hyperspace before anything else can happen is more important.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little something for the week end


	5. Red tape is the ally of the dark side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Sith are really Space Vikings

Chancellor Palpatine regrettably didn’t stay in Jedi custody for long as the Banites had successfully ensured that the red tape meant that he was out on bail in a week. 

Unfortunately for Chancellor Palpatine Yoda had spent the time demonstrating his stamina and superior flexibility to Senator Naberrie and her handmaiden Sabe who were both thoroughly impressed and in addition to receiving an open invitation to join them for etching appreciation whenever their schedules matched up, was now very, very open to the Force. The Force was in a very chatty mood and Yoda learnt a lot of lost Jedi History including the Chancellors location and current plans.

Yoda was firmly of the opinion that the ancient Jedi had been complete idiots in apparently building the Jedi temple directly over the original Sith temple, probably because they weren’t getting any nookie, it was that or they were on some seriously good spice. Really who ever thought that was a good idea ought to be lightsabered to death. Especially since they’d failed to put a lift in. Twenty-five thousand and twenty three and a half steps to get to the Sith temple was exhausting even for Jedi. Even if they are going to finally finish the Sith Lord. Force Darn it after they’d dealt with the Sith lord, he was going to get a lift put in even if he had to Force persuade the entire Senate appropriations committee to get the funds .

In the Force a very bemused Qui-gon Jinn is surrounded by partying Sith Lords. Dying and refusing to become one with the force had turned out to be surprisingly informative for Qui-gon Jinn and not just in the way he expected. The few Jedi he’d found were either too serene to talk to you or too depressed about what happened after they died. 

The Sith on the other hand turned out to be a surprisingly helpful and cheerful bunch. Talking to the Sith Lords of old had lead Qui-gon to the true reason that Sith Lords of old had as many apprentices as possible. The Force to the Sith Lords is a bit like Valhalla. You fight the other Sith Lines for supremacy, party hard all night long and in the morning do it all again. 

He hasn't met any of Banes line yet as Bane pissed them all off when he founded the line of two. Instead of building on Sith Knowledge the Banite’s have become progressively more ignorant. So no new ideas to shake up the tedium of fighting the same people for century’s. This had resulted in the Sith uniting as a whole for the first time ever to show the Banites just why this was a real bad idea. Annoyingly, from the Sith Lords point of view, none of the Banites hadn't lasted more than a century or two..

The Sith Lords of old had welcomed Qui-gon and were enthusiastically looking forward to meeting Dooku. Dooku might be an ex Jedi but he’s got new ideas. They can work with that. 

Meanwhile Darth Plagueis is curled up in a corner bitterly regretting becoming a Baneite while feeling relieved that the Sith Lords ire will now be split between him and his apprentice.

As for Sidius he hasn’t coalescenced in the force yet. But Drunk Sith Lords are already hanging off Qui-gon Jinn and making cutting remarks about Sidius choice of Sith Ceremonial Robes. Think Dumbledore at his worst and combine with pimp your car bling.

Most of the injuries the Jedi Council suffered from were due less to Darth Sidius fighting skills and more due to the fact that just looking at his robes made them feel seasick and sunglasses would really have helped with all the bling... from the outside the fight looked a bit like a demented Christmas tree with all the coloured lights flashing round in the dark.

Jinn is now trying to decide if he wants to Join the Sith as they are a lot of fun or if he should adopt Plagueis as one of his pathetic life forms…decision, decisions.

Meanwhile Master Vokara Che is helping Commander Ponds and the 91st smuggle Master Mace Windu off Coruscant before he snaps and goes Vaapad on Master Yoda ass for continuing to insist that all bickering and arguing and nearly a brawl between Mace and Eeth Koth on their way down to the hidden Sith temple to confront Sidious was due to unresolved sexual tension between Mace and Eeth and the two of them should have at it. 

Master Vokara Che suggested to Commander Ponds that Master Windu will find the Mandlorian outpost, Kebble quite relaxing. Commander Ponds and the 91st* don’t care as long as they never have to witness their bad ass General (Buir) breakdown and cry again.

As for **Master Eeth Koth the injuries he received mean that the high levels of medication he is currently on have caused him to responding to all and any news with the words “Oh I say, Jolly good show, Carry on” the Healers are now worried about brain fevers. His new found urge strip down and go el natural isn’t helping his chances of escaping the healing halls any time soon either. Though many of the other patients are very appreciative of Master Koth thoughtful desire to bring a splash of bright colour to the healing halls rather insipid paint scheme

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Kids don’t like to see their parents cry its scary and the Mandlorians are going to provide lots of stress relief for Mace.  
> **Master Koth was in a coma. and some times this results in strange changes in accents. its a really medical thing


	6. Be careful what you wish for

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hondo, Maul and Bo, OH BOY!

Much to the horror of Hondo Ohnaka, Obi-wan and Cody took the 212 to Florrum to hide out from the nookie mad Yoda, while deciding what to do next. 

While there the Force responded to Mauls very sad wish to have a life full of choices. Alas the Force is very old and a bit hard of hearing, which led to the Force being unsure if what Maul had asked for was a life full of Choices or Clones, So Blubbering in to its hanky the Force turns Maul in to a little tiny baby Maul and then drops him off with Cody and Obi-wan on Florrum, who the Force knows will raise him with lots clones and choices. Job done. 

Baby Maul is super cute and soon has the population of Florrum wound round his little red finger. Waxer and Boil baby sit often. Waxer volunteering for the practice and Boil, because Boil has adored the little mite, ever since Maul nearly bit Anakin’s finger off for trying to steal Maul’s Chocolate Bournville and then Maul offering it to Boil. The Vode of the 212 have a sweet tooth and Anakin is a known and dreaded cookie thief. Anakin had arrived on Florrum to sulk over his wife, her handmaiden and his grandmasters week long orgy being okay by Naboo standards.

After a month even Obi-wan had gotten feed up with Anakin’s whining and had actually taken up Hondo’s offer to take him and Cody to this great bar I know, to let off steam. The Takodana regulars claimed they had never seen anything like it before as Cody, Hondo and Obi-wan got completely rat faced over Anakin stupidity.

” You always read the contract before you sign it. I taught him that I know I taught him that”. Obi-wan 

“As my sweet mother always said, ‘Son, some people only learn the hard way.” Hondo. 

Maz sent the Order the bill for structural damage. When the order claimed that Hondo should pay some of it, Maz responded that Hondo had nothing to do with it. It was all down to Commander Cody and General Kenobi. 

A blushing Maz fanned herself as she informed a disbelieving finance department “That those boys sure know how to make the earth move and they can come back and do that any time, just so long as I know in advance to reinforce the foundations”. 

Maz was wise enough not to ask for a donation to pay for the crèche that need building on Takodana due to the baby boom that resulted from Cody and Kenobi’s visit. She just added a little extra for the latest medical droid and maternity equipment, since some of the match ups and behaviours had been very odd. One of the smugglers astromech droid was having sympathy pains and while its morning sickness was annoying to deal with, seeing how it actually coped with the birth pains when some idiot had up graded the laser pointer to a laser scalpel was not being looked forward to by anyone. The bounty hunter it had imprinted on was still in denial.

Then there were the long term affects as *Maz expected that a number of the infants would be abandoned as their parents couldn’t cope with the side effects of conception and pregnancy that close to a Force user that had released all restraints on their heart.**

With the assistance of a delighted Hondo, Cody and Obi-wan arranged with the pirate to smuggle Anakin back to his wife and departed with the 212 for Concodia to meet up with Obi-wans contact there. The Mandlorian Protectors had no problems agreeing to the arrangement that Obi-wan had come up with. 

The only worry was when a fully armoured and blood-stained Bo Katan turned up while Maul was having a bath. All the witness were traumatized by Bo’s sudden high pitched squeal followed by a sharp “GIVE ME!” Bo’s cooing and baby talk was most off-putting. So now Little Maul has an Aunty Bo, who both Obi-wan and the Arc nulls have taken to discreetly getting checked out by healers and medical personal due to Bo disturbing new habit of melting in to a pile of goo round Maul and talking nothing but gibberish. That and the difficulty they have in getting her to let go once she’s got him in her arms. 

Satine was just hoping that Bo stuck to squee’ing over her honorary nephew and didn’t go through with her threat to get her own baby’s especially as she’s was talking about getting the Kaminoians to combine Bo DNA with a few other people. Obi-wan was using Cody as a shield until Bo started eying Cody as well and muttering about how Jango Fett had great genes, shame about the personality. Then Cody joined Obi-wan in hiding every time Bo arrived to see her neffy.

Bo got her baby’s and Satine was torn with being happy that as Aunty, Godmom and Buir she had very little time to cause Satine trouble, on the other hand Satine was mortified that Bo had become the first person in the history of the Kamioans to be black listed.

The fact that Bo had wanted hair like Bo’s, skin like Obi’s and eyes like Cody’s, Hair like Bo’s, skin like Cody’s and eyes like Obi’s, Hair like Obi’s, skin like Bo’s and eyes like Cody’s, and so on and in both male and female compo’s plus Bo’s need to micro manage had the Kamioans tearing their non-existent hair out. The Kriffn’ Sith Lord wasn’t nearly as difficult to deal with. 

How did Bo get her DNA, well she bribed Boil. Numa wound up being big sis to three boys and one girl who were a mix of Waxer, Boil, and Maul. The only reason that Cody didn’t kill Boil, was Boil plunked a variety of Cody/Obi-wan baby’s in his arms before running away .......................

Maul got his various clone siblings into a lot of trouble and they in turn got him into an equal amount of trouble growing up but between them, the clones, various Force users, the crowd from Takodana, bossy big sister Numa, the Force and Uncle Savage who turned up one day and never left, they always managed to come out okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *The Consequences Maz know about will be explained in Twinkle, Twinkle I wonder what you are  
> **Obi-wan loves Cody lots and Cody loves his Jedii back

**Author's Note:**

> This started when I read Merfillys wonderful Wish Virus vers and then it would not stop. Since both Merfilly and I found it kind of funny and I can't really write. I invite you all to come in to this sandpit and Jump up and down. just let me know if you base any thing on this so I can enjoy your version of my madness


End file.
